Identity

Joining Lisa-Jo and others this morning for Five Minute Friday, where we cut the words loose for just five minutes, and see where they fall. No editing, just encouraging the others who play along. The topic today is Identity.



Where is my identity? How do I define myself? Is it by the moments, the actions, the thoughts?
My first identity was found as a child--my identity in Christ. This is the identity that should define every moment of my life-sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't. But regardless of whether I am fully surrendered to Christ, He has had a profound impact on my life. Is that even enough? I cannot say what I would be without Christ, nothing. I can't imagine my life without Him. Even on the days that I'm grumpy, cranky, annoyed, frustrated, and definitely NOT living the surrendered Christian life (or even taking time for Him), even on those days I can see my identity in Him. Because Christ is what defines my existence, and without him I would have no worth. 
The second role that defines me is that of being a wife. I am my husbands wife, and this is a relationship that transcends all other earthly relationships and loyalties. My parents are dearly loved, but God has commanded me to leave them and cleave to my husband. My children will come, and eventually they will leave me and cleave to their spouses. But my husband, he is mine. I am his. And this relationship is worth everything I can give to it. It is part of my identity.
My third role is that of mother--I am the mother of two little ones. One is with Jesus. One is due to make an appearance in just a few more weeks. Although I've never met either of my little ones in person, they have in many ways defined my life ever since I got that first positive pregnancy test. I have prayed for them, wept for them, loved them, planned for them, hoped for them, and dreamed for them. As much as I have identified myself as a mother for the last year, after this little one is born I will gradually find even more of my identity in motherhood. 
I have many other identities... I am a daughter, a friend, a leader of young ladies, the wife of our church's Music Director, a sister, a neighbor, and a writer. I am creative, thrifty, and a home decorator. All of these roles and more come together to define who I am. And ultimately that is a good thing--so long as those first three roles stay at the top and in that order. 
What roles define your identity?

Budgeting With Mama

Lessons from mama is a weekly guest post from my mother, sharing different lessons on homemaking she has learned over the years. This was inspired after I interviewed her for the series "Teachers of Good Things."  You can head over to her interview to see a more complete list of the topics we will be covering (it is under the 5th question, What would you have done differently as a single woman to prepare for this?).

For budgeting I highly recommend either checking out the book by Dave Ramsey called “Total Money Makeover” OR take his Financial Peace seminar. The thing that has worked the best for us is to use the cash in envelopes system. Figure out your budget and with each pay check set aside cash to put in envelopes for the categories that you will be paying cash for. We have the following cash categories: Groceries, Gas, Giving, Date night, Savings, and allowances for Jeff and I.

It is easy to stay in the budget for groceries. When the cash is gone, you quit spending.

The best tip I can give you is: Don’t spend more than you make. This means don’t use credit cards. Learn patience and pray about needs.

When figuring out your monthly budget, here are things to consider:


GIVING
SAVING (Emergency Fund; Retirement Fund; College Fund)
HOUSING (Mortgage; Real Estate Taxes; Homeowners Insurance; Repairs; and Furniture)
UTILITIES (Electricity; Water; Gas; Phone)
FOOD (Grocery and Restaurants)
TRANSPORTATION (Car Payment; Gas and Oil; Repairs and Tires; Car Insurance; License and Taxes; Car Replacement)
CLOTHING (Children; Adults and Cleaning/Laundry)
MEDICAL/HEALTH (Health Insurance; Doctor Bills; Dentist; Optometrist; and Medicine)
PERSONAL (Life Insurance; Toiletries; Hair Care; Education; Gifts (including Christmas); Date night; Miscellaneous; and *BLOW $$)
RECREATION (Entertainment and Vacation)
DEBTS (Hopefully -0-)

Baby List, one month to go!

With about four weeks left before my due date, I've been buckling down and getting ready for this baby. My hubby has been telling me for weeks that I'm nesting, but when he first started saying that I didn't believe him. People throw around the term "nesting" so often, that the minute an expecting mom decides to do a major house clean she's determined to be "nesting," even if she would have done that same clean on the same day were she not expecting a baby. So, I didn't go for the "nesting" theory. I was just doing what needed to be done, and I'm pretty sure I would have done it even if I weren't pregnant.

But.... now it's official. I've spent the last few days getting the nursery ready, cleaning, organizing, planning--whatever your definition of nesting is, I've been doing exactly that for the last three days. To the point that I genuinely dislike anything slowing down my nesting projects ("Bedtime, Shmed-time! why would I stop putting together the baby's book case just so I can get some sleep?" or, "Ah, man.... sewing? Do I HAVE to? Baby's closet needs to be organized! Now!").

Yeah, it's silly. But it DOES need to be done...

Part of my nesting is making sure I have everything together for Baby. In less than a week I'll be considered "full term" which means I need to at least have the basics on hand! Here is my previous list, updated:

Necessities

Carseat~I got this at my shower--hurray! And THANK YOU to the ones who gave it to me (it was a group gift)

Diaper Bag~I got this at my shower--and I absolutely love it. The bag is huge, and has a bunch of pockets. Isn't it pretty?

Diapers/wipes (cloth/disposable)~I still need these, but I have enough disposables to get through the first week or two if baby comes early. I've registered on Amazon for some cloth diapers, but will want a stash of disposables also. It's nice to have flexibility--especially the first few weeks when I'm getting used to having a baby around. :-)

Clothing~I have a few different sets of onsies already from grandparents and friends. I'm focusing on gender neutral colors (yellow, green, etc).

 Stroller~Still working on this one

Sling or carrier~Still need this. I'm thinking the Ergo looks best, though I've heard it doesn't work well for infants. If that's true, I'd go with the Moby wrap. 

Receiving blankets/spit up cloths~I have one package, but could probably use a few more. 

Baby Bath~Got it!! (or, going to get it, anyway. It's in the mail. :-) But I have some cute bath toys to hold me over)

Nice to Have

Bottles/pump~I have the bottles now, still need the pump. Having bottles and a pump will give more flexibility in the long term, but it won't be the main form of feeding  

Playpen~Already have this thanks to my aunt/uncle!

Swing~Definitely handy to have.

Diaper pail~Yeah.... Definitely a good thing. We'll probably just get a sturdy metal trash can with a lid. It doesn't have to be fancy.

Nursing cover/supplies~I have the nursing supplies, still need a nursing cover and a nursing pillow. 

Super-awesome-paci-that-a-smart-mother-with-a-sick-baby-invented--Okay, okay, that wasn't on my original list. But aren't those pacis neat? One is a medicine dispenser, the other is a thermometer. I have no idea if they will work for my baby, but the idea is brilliant. And very, very sneaky.  

Furniture

Changing table/dresser combo~Have it.... sort of. :-) I am now the overly proud owner of a cube. Isn't it cute? It's also color coded, and I built it myself. The cube gives me the same amount of storage space as a dresser (but more organized), so the dresser is no longer a "need." I am going to keep my eye out for one, though, as any extra storage space is always useful and it would be nice to have the changing table top (the ONLY downside to my wonderful cube is that it isn't big enough to accomodate a changing pad on top like a dresser could). I'll look for one at a garage sale, and paint it to match the other furniture. 

Crib and mattress~I have the crib and mattress picked out now. We had considered waiting till after delivery to purchase them as they are more pricey and Baby will be with us the first little while, but I'm so eager to see the nursery finished I may not be able to wait that long! :P

Book Case~Got it! I put this together the same day I made my cube, and it is sooooo nice to get all our books neatly put away!! I'm seriously pleased with it. AND, most of the books on the shelf are kids books. Older kids, but still kids. As it is the "nursery" book shelf, I'm quite pleased.  

Tilapia--day 5

Today was, quite possibly, the easiest and most effective freezer cooking day I've ever had. This afternoon the Tilapia from Zaycon was ready to be picked up. It came in two 10lb boxes, which was nice because I had split the purchase with a friend. We thought we'd have to divide a single 20 lb case, so it was handy to have it already separated for us.

I started with a box that looked like this....

Each of the tilapia are about 4 oz, and were individually flash frozen. Because they were frozen already the only thing I needed to do to get them "freezer ready" was divide them into serving sizes. I decided to use quart sized Ziploc bags, and was able to get four tilapia per bag, or two dinners worth. It took me 20 minutes at most to get them divided. Easy Peasy. 

...And ended with 9 bags like this

I had one for lunch today (I don't recall ever having tilapia before), and while I still prefer salmon, the tilapia was pretty good. After I've had time to experiment, maybe I'll have some great recipes to share.

There were a total of 36 Tilapia in the 10lb box, so I ended up with 9 bags, and 18 dinners ($1.50 per meal). Not bad for a "days" work!

Orange French Toast

Awhile back I found this recipe on Allrecipes, and fell in love. The added orange flavor really kicks the french toast experience into high gear.

Of course, I never can leave a recipe be, so I soon began tweaking and changing the recipe to reach "perfection." Part of the tweaking was figuring out how to include more protein, because protein is one of my major pregnancy focus areas. It's also the one area that I must maintain if I want to feel good. Days I don't get much protein I'm constantly hungry, days I get a good amount of protein I'm satisfied. With that in mind, breakfast is a good place to start!

This recipe is the one I used for Freezer Cooking Day 3 this month. It makes more than we eat in a single meal, however it is nice to be able to freeze the extras for another meal.

1 dozen eggs

1 Tbs orange juice (optional)

1 Tbs orange zest

2 tsp vanilla extract

1/2 tsp nutmeg

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp salt

1 tsp sugar

6 pieces of whole grain bread

Combine all ingredients in a dish except bread and mix well. 

  Dip bread into dish, coating in egg mixture on both sides, and allow to soak for at least 2 hours, but as long as overnight. The bread will not soak up all the egg mixture. When prepared to cook, place on skillet at medium-low heat.

To give it that extra boost of protein, I use a trick I learned from my mom. First prick each piece of bread generously with a fork...

...and then ladle spoonfuls of the leftover egg mixture into the bread. Take your time with this, the bread will not absorb the egg quickly. If I am patient I can usually use up the full amount of egg mixture, meaning I'm getting a ratio of two eggs for each slice of bread.

This is what the french toast looked like when I'd finished ladling--you can see how much of the egg mixture each slice took. Once it has cooked (and the egg mixture has firmed up a bit) flip and cook on the other side. When finished, remove from skillet and enjoy!

I usually make enough for several meals, and freeze the leftovers in ziploc bags.

Babies, marriage, and Gods gifts

Looking through the last few 1000 gifts posts I realize how incredibly intense the last few months have been for me. Spiritually, emotionally, physically--when I sit down each week and review what has happened just thinking about it feels exhausting. 

This past week was different. It was a week of recovery. I did spend a few days "flattened," but I rested through them. I stayed home. I worked on the house (and made great progress!). I did some fun things (like napping :P). It was a hard, abrupt stop after the busyness of the last few weeks. And God knew it was just the kind of week I've needed. 

After such a restful week, this past weekend we had my first baby shower. We had so much fun! The decorations were lovely--on the theme of Peter Rabbit and Beatrix Potter. The games were absolutely hilarious, and had most of us in stitches at least once. I got to see some old friends, a few of whom went VERY out of their way to make it there. And once the shower was over I was showing Richard my presents and realized were a lot closer to "being ready" for Baby than I realized. That's a very, very nice feeling for this mom-to-be. :-)

All in all, this past week has been a gift from God. First in giving me the time to relax and be productive at the same time (while I did rest a LOT last week, I also got a lot accomplished around the house--from cleaning and organizing to daily chipping away at my freezer cooking goals). Second, the encouragement that I've gotten this weekend from old friends, family, and on baby prep has been wonderful. I had been feeling overwhelmed with what I had left to do, now I'm not. We've got a month, we can do this!



446. A week with my mom and brother
447. Intense sessions making me focus on Christ
448. Making a list of my favorite books
449. purchasing the very, very best books
450. a york mint frappe

451. Lunch with my sister, Grace
452. Putting my feet up in the AC after a long, hot day
453. Seeing my man after days of being apart
454. Rest
455. A whole evening with my man--no planning, no figuring, no stress (and no dishes). Just us.

I thought the cabbage bowls (top L, and bottom middle) were so cute! (472)

456. A love letter
457. Being reminded of what marriage is about
458. Laughter in a room full of women as we gave each other shoulder rubs on a break
459. A generous gift
460. Seeing progress--little by little

461. Freezer meals, cooked and ready
462. Days of rest after a week of "on my feet"
463. An unexpected evening at home (and the foot rub that followed)
464. Encouraging numbers
465. Putting words to paper
466. Natalie and her arm rubs

470

467. Going to see a movie with my family
468. Getting all dolled up--pretty clothes, pretty face, pretty day
469. My first shower!
470. Seeing old friends
471. Abi, who flew down so she could come to my shower
472. Cabbage dishes

475

473. Cute, cute decorations
474. Beautiful, thoughtful presents--perfect!
475. Games that kept us in stitches
476. Hugs from friends
477. Looking through my baby supplies and realizing I'm not as far off as I thought anymore

Warrior Princess

 

Walking With the Lord is a pause we take here at Ruby in the Rough to focus on the things of the Lord. Sometimes it will be a devotional, a poem, or a lesson from our church that stood out as being particularly applicable.

My Sister In Law, Grace, is a wonderful writer and gave me permission to share one of her recent posts for our Walking With the Lord feature. Enjoy!

The Warrior Princess lie in mud in a cloudy darkness and had been there for about a week, although she couldn’t really remember how long. She groaned as pain pulsed through her bruised body. Weak and head throbbing, she slowly pulled herself up from the ground to a sitting position. She was covered in dry blood and mud. Running her fingers through her mud-caked hair she tried to recall what had happened.

“Where’s my armor?” Horror filled her heart as she realized she didn’t know where it was. Squinting her eyes she could make out the outline of her armor strewn in the darkness around her. It all came back now.

It started when she took her eyes off the cross. She hadn’t meant to, she just became unintentional about her focus. After she had traveled on for awhile she put her sword in her sheath thinking that it was getting rather wearisome to hold out all the time. Plus, she saw no signs of the enemy, surely they wouldn’t attack. On she walked oblivious to the fact that her enemies’ greatest desire was for her to put her sword in her sheath.

She continued her way unaware that it slowly grew darker. Soon, she was lost in a thick dark cloud and instead of crying out for help she stumbled on. Her shield of faith slipped out of her hand and dropped with a slow, dramatic thud to the ground.

All of a sudden, she found herself surrounded by the enemy. Frantically, she looked for her shield, but it was too dark. In her nervousness she couldn’t manage to pull her sword out of her sheath. There she was, trapped and defenseless. Her enemies mocked and laughed at her as they danced around in glee. They were all there–Flesh, Pride, Emptiness, Failure, Depression, Loneliness and others.

In the darkness they spoke lies to her and tormented her. Fear filled her soul and she felt as if she’d never experience joy again. For as they danced round her, one would knock her down, another would throw a rock at her, another would slap her cheek, and so on. It was utter distress and agony for she could not see her attackers, nor what they would do next.

She felt so ashamed. “How could this happen?” “Will I ever live in victory?!” She wept, and groaned, and pleaded with them to stop. But it was of no avail, the enemies’ attacks didn’t let up—if anything, they increased.

“Look what you did! You failed again!” “You’ll never be like your precious Shepherd King—never!” “Just give up!” They called out in torment.

Want the rest of the story? Check out Grace's blog here: Uncommon Grace